Sunday, January 17, 2016

Coasting Through January

     January has been a month to get back on track, of sorts. I had some dreaded tasks hanging over me like a bad dream that wouldn't end so I tackled them head-on. The first, most-dreaded task was filing and printing tax stuff for my bookkeeping job. When a task is done but once per year, it's like starting from scratch for the very first time and I have to figure out the computer program all over again. I hate revisiting old stuff and having it greet my like it's new. Now that I've finished it, I have a much lighter attitude. Now I'm ready to move on!


     As my reward, I worked on to a sewing project. I've been motivated to replenish my apron supply and eliminate some of my worn out aprons. Over the years, I've gravitated toward simpler apron designs and I prefer those that are more like smocks. In my search for a pattern, I found the ultimate apron! It's called the Maria Wrap Apron. I completed my first one this weekend using a dark gray linen. I couldn't be happier with how it turned out. The hardest part of the whole project was printing and constructing the pattern itself. The pattern is only available to purchase as a downloadable pdf file. You have to print it on copy paper from your printer, then piece it together like a quilt, then cut out the pattern. On the positive side, the download is yours to print, in any size, whenever you have need. On the negative side, copy paper is thick, hard to pin and not very flexible. I would like to find some large sheets of tissue paper and transfer the copy-paper pattern to tissue paper for easier handling and pinning. Now that I've completed my first apron and am familiar with the pattern construction, I'm eager to make another. There's a tutorial to make a reversible version of the apron and I may give that a go.
     Remember those trolls from my last post? Well, a friend phoned me the day after I posted about them and said they are selling on ebay. She encouraged me to have a look. Sure enough, people want them. I listed the lot of them and have two bidders with seven more watching and three days until auction's end. They're currently at $26.25. It's nowhere near a get- rich endeavor, but I'm happy for them to go to someone who really wants them.
     Things continue to be the same with my mom. Too many falls, but no serious injuries since the broken nose and lost tooth, thank goodness. We had one fall at 2:00am, which was rough, but Tess helped save the night for that one. On Saturday I took mom for a scenic drive into the mountains just for something to do. I've become accustom to my emotional cycle of compassion vs. annoyance. The compassion always outweighs the annoyance. I've become pretty good at turning off my annoyance. It serves no purpose. I still carry an undercurrent of depression, which is difficult to ignore. I'm sure this is normal in any caregiver situation. The need to be a compassionate caregiver automatically puts ones emotions at a vulnerable disadvantage. I've never been a patient person and apparently this is where God thinks I need the most work. I'm still learning abut patience. Patience to converse with someone who has a speech impediment, patience to clean an elderly person's bathroom (it's different), patience to listen to conversations about my sister's death, a topic I would rather not visit on a weekly basis, patience to repeat sentences five times over, patience to see my family and friends all doing things and going places and feeling left behind, and so on. I plan to ride it out and grab moments of respite when I can. My favorite escape has turned out to be my little walk with Henri around the circumference of our property. Most days I can't wander too far away and it only takes us fifteen minutes if we stay on the property, but there is so much to see on that little walk! I see little things that make me smile and at the same time the air clears my head. I'll share some photos after my walk today so you can see what I mean.
     Our fourth grandchild and first baby for Chelsea and Simon was due last Saturday and we eagerly await news of his or her arrival. Chelsea lives far away so I won't be able to go and see them or help out but, she introduced me to facetime and it will suffice until they can come visit us. Arrive safely little one! We love you already. : )


3 comments:

  1. I too await a new grand due last week...
    Compassion V. annoyance, how well (or really not so well) I ride that rollercoaster. Your words on your mom help me to know we are not alone in our caregivers loneliness. If that make sense.
    THAT APRON! I love it. I might add a pocket or two if I make one for myself. I always save the newsprint type paper the store clerks wrap breakable items in. The large sheets are great for grandkid art projects, but I am wondering if it would work for pattern paper? Not as flexible as tissue, but has to be better than copy paper.

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  2. So has the baby come yet??? Exciting!

    Love that apron. And I admire you for your patience - I'm sure you are needing it. Hugs!

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  3. Indeed when the range of emotions surfaces it can be challenging to put each in its right place so we can live with joy and not resentment or bitterness. I admire you perseverance and love for your mother. You are a blessing to all who are honored to know you. Baby's make life that much busier and fuller. Thinking warmly of you and your family

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