I received a kind and generous comment from Anita a post or two back. She wrote, "You have an amazing life." When I read that, I dropped my forehead on my desk and thought, "No!No!No!"
My life is exactly NOT that.
Blogs easily give that impression when they only focus on the good, which is exactly the nature of my blog.
Life is stressful, hard, sad and painful. I am a broken person with a broken life. For real.
Because of this, I write beautiful reminders to myself each day so that I can focus on the blessings that I see as gifts from God. The crazy thing is, when I go back and read all my previous entries, I realize that I do have an amazing life! We all have amazing lives when we look at them through this lens!
Just for fun, here's the dirt:
1. Am I really supposed to be losing this much hair?
2. "Uh, Mom. I got pulled over but don't worry..."
3. The dog vomitted where?
4. Daughter #4 still needs to finish high school and go to college. $$
5. I like to eat. Heck, I love to eat.
6. My mom is 92 and sad...a lot...I call her every morning... sometimes twice a day...and it hurts.
7. Should my knees, back, feet, hands, neck hurt this much when I get out of bed each morning?
8. I speak my mind.
9. I have a temper.
10. I can be totally unreasonable. See #9
11. I love too much.
12. How much is that new rim and tire going to cost?
13. I embarrass my husband when I'm goofy (and with certain impersonations.)
14. Sometimes my family is scattered to the four corners with the wind and I am very, very lonely.
15. People I love have serious relational issues and I wish I could help them, but I can't. All I can do is listen and pray.
16. I worry about my children and grandchildren.
17. I need to bake a gazillion (cookies, muffins, turkeys, you name it) by when?
18. Oh my gosh, it's only 2:00am. and I'm WIDE awake. Will I ever get a good nights sleep!
19. Our life contains words like cancer, divorce, and depression.
20. Damn, why won't this checkbook balance?
21. I swear on occasion. But I try not to in front of the pastor... or the grandchildren.
22. I am seriously not mature enough to have these responsibilities.
23. I have no more hormones. Or maybe I do but they're the bad kind.
24. I stare into space and wonder about the future of everything.
25. Is it me or is it hot in here?
26. This headache is killing me.
27. I just realized this list could go to infinity and beyond.
Amazing life? The answer is yes...and no. It all depends on how you look at it. : )
This is great and so very true, but thank you for sharing love and hope each day in your blog posts. I myself tend to complain too much, and my life, despite normal aggravations, is very blessed. You lift your readers up, and there will always be a place for that kind of magic.
ReplyDeleteI think you and I are kindred spirits, Lee. I think of myself the same way - broken, but I write my blog for the same reasons - life is amazing, indeed, depending upon how you look at it.
ReplyDeleteA young lady I admire very much was an intern at my church - Whitney. Here's a link to her blog: http://glimpsinggrace.wordpress.com/ She is a Presbyterian minister in Cameron, North Carolina now. In a sermon she preached at my church (in 2007), she spoke about her blog, how she wrote her "glimpses of grace" and how the idea came from Clare's blog. When I read both blogs, I thought, "I should do that, too" just as an exercise in positivity. And it's worked. But honestly - I cringe, too, when readers put me on a pedestal and think, "if they only knew." :)
I love it Lynn- I've thought that about us, too : )
DeleteThank you for the link- the name looks familiar and I may have run across it before. I'll make another visit.!